It is ironic to me that the process of feeling our best is referred to as a whole because to feel whole, I literally had to come apart. There were so many parts of myself that were floating around and I was afraid to feel them. Many parts were dark and scary in my interpretation and with no idea of what “whole” means, examining it seemed unimaginable. Then it happened, we burned the barn down and in the dark was the moon and the stars. The sun rose again the next day. I thought this was just going to be a one-time event where I did the hard work and “Presto” all would be “right”. As it turns out this really is a practice on the road to wellness.
Does Practice Make Perfect?
While growing up, practicing meant a lot to me. Learning something by repeating it over and over until it was perfect. This applied to times tables, speaking French, cheerleading and horseback riding. As I aged I kept up with practice but it shifted into being the best employee, having the most sales, or the best relationship. I practiced alright, again and again, each time ignoring my soul’s desire to be loved from within. I entrenched myself into patterns of validating myself from outside sources. The harder I tried to validate the harder I fell until I hit the bottom of the barrel and stumbled upon the practice of wholeness.
This time as I burned down the barn, practicing took on a new meaning. As I emerged from the ashes, the practice wasn’t about burning down time and time again or about getting it perfect. It was absolutely not about anyone else either, for the first time it was all about me. All of me. With wholeness, practicing took on a new meaning. There was no right or wrong. It simply became about being in any experience in full awareness and learning but especially bringing everything back to me.
How I Increased My Own Wellness
Letting go of being perfect and embracing practice has enabled me to turn up more fully as a human being. I feel that we all have masculine and feminine energies and that to live in awareness is to live within a sacred union of the two fully supporting each other and is where we are truly operating from the whole. From this place, I feel we heal the Earth and each other and it is what I feel is the rising of the Divine Feminine.
I feel the feminine and masculine have been separated into parts and that the masculine paradigm is what has conditioned us to reward our minds and stay in competition and perfection. Through my experience wholeness has enabled me to unite those parts and helped me to step into what I feel as softness, collaboration, connection, and authenticity, a new paradigm.
Operating from a place of a whole has shown me that the changes may seem subtle but they feel momentous. Operating from this place with others who aren’t, has posed some great learning opportunities within my practice. Every time I learn and grow, someone else has that opportunity. It is in this way that I feel the practice spreads slowly and surely for even if the other person doesn’t join the practice, my practice deepened which means I may better explain to someone who is open to receive.
I chose to deepen my practice so that I can continue to lean into growth and to explore tools for growing in a world where not everyone is ready for such a practice. As paradigms continue to crumble I trust that more and more people are looking and ready for real change. Wholeness, in my opinion, is the foundation for achieving the highest level of health and wellness. This is the starting point for all change and a valuable tool to empower the continued rising of the Feminine to a state of sacred Union.