Diary – 1st Week of May

Dear Diary,

As I walk today, I see things differently. I feel as if the colours of plants have gotten more vibrant more intense and have become 3D. I see Forsythia, an early bloomer, vibrant and strong and immediately feel my 3rd Chakra light up with acknowledgement. The tulips and daffodils scream at me COURAGE and action and I feel that fire energy, the drive, the 3rd Chakra Warrior. As I continue to walk, I realize my subtle energy body system has shifted, I am walking as if in a 3D movie (or strange drug induced hallucination) where everything seems to be showing me its energetic personality. Feeling as if I am Alice in Wonderland, I keep walking and noticing. I stare blinded by love at the Pink and Purple Hyacinths and for the first time, notice that they are shaped like the pineal gland and honour their blind trust that Spring is upon us and realize that they are higher sight and faith: 6th and 7th Chakras.

Where would I be without plants.

I ponder why I am suddenly having this heightened experience because I am curious, and my mind always likes to think it knows. I retrace my steps and realize I have carved out more time for the sacred. I have been doing my Japa Mala meditation and muttering sweet nothings and prayers to plants, my soul, and the higher realms. I have been doing more yoga and been practicing my inward journey and finding my edge. I have spent a great deal of time in the garden talking to seeds and seedlings and asking them how to plant them as I design our new front lawn. All of the work in the dirt, the planning, the holding of live medicinal plants and food has kept me feeling present and in that space.

I have been gifted a higher sight.

This new sight unfolds illuminating a shift. The shift is in me but it is also the collective. I feel the solar plexus now coming online for many as we shift into taking action. This shift resonates on a bigger level as I realize that Beltane is upon us, the fire of our passion, the season of creation and we need to take action to create. I lean into these feelings, what is coming with this shift, what is already here, and instantly I feel magic. This year I know I must honour the magic. I have come to learn that magic is very personal. What is magic to me is mere gardening to another or a complete waste of time to someone else. I know for me, the magic I need is in the earth and so for Beltane, I make special offerings of cedar and spend time in reverence with the plants of the garden. I sat in reverence all week of the plants and still am in awe of the many layers they continue to teach me.

While with the plants, I remember my roots, I hear my guides, I see the auras of flowers and I hear the whispers of the Earth. The Earth is speaking to me and asking what action will I take now that the collective and the cosmic energies are aligning us to do so? I commune with the Earth, my guides and the sun and moon, I am humbled. I feel the impending cleanse that must come for more illumination.
As I feel the solar plexus again I am reminded of the many emotions that reside within the stomach and liver. I sense that some action is needed to release stored emotions and energy that no longer serve. In that release I feel the dark, murky place of depression and the polarity of sweet acceptance.

I feel a dance, two flames, I am learning to dance one foot in reality and one in a heightened energetic state. I don’t know where this dance will take me, it is the unknown and sometimes that conjures up dark feelings. I am holding space for the darker feelings akin to depression because I recognize them as part of the grieving process. Truth is, I have been grieving; a world I wanted, a world I knew to a world unfolding. When I left for Mexico, I was in denial that this virus would be anything more than a standard flu. I got so angry at the world for the way people were responding to it, at our government for the removal of rights, and at the virus itself for upending my world. I got sad, I was defeated, I didn’t think I could ever go on and I believed all was lost. Three angels swooped in during that low point and ignited the resurrection. I am still dancing now with the remnants of depression and sadness and grief but I have been doing it in a container. The container has allowed me to give myself a space to grieve and a place to step out of it. Having this container has required constant presence so I can choose when to be in and out of it. The less I need in the container of grief the more I am aware of moving into acceptance. As the solar plexus lights up with this Beltane heat, I am ready. I am ready for co-creative action and the more I lean into acceptance the more action I begin to take and the more time I spend with the plants. The more time I spend with the plants the more my heightened senses come into focus.

Where would I be without plants?

All Naturally Curious Members
(I invite you to join us if you haven’t already) have access to a monthly plant talk.
This month, we take a deep dive into this gorgeous plant above that graces us with her beautiful yellow flowers at this time of year.

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